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The concept of love can be interpreted differently by people all around the world. A typical phrase repeated throughout many cultures is “falling in love.” However, using the word “fall” implies that this was accidental, and therefore something you were not looking for. It also subtly infers bad news, pain, or injury. 

“What happened to you? Are you alright?” 

“I was not paying enough attention and fell…”

Being in love is our natural state so there is no falling necessary. In addition, love grows when cultivated and expanded upon with conscious intention. 

Love by definition is unconditional. This means that nothing nor no one can give it or take it away. Even after a horrible break up our love is still there beneath the anger, pain, and frustration. 

Love is a field of energy that is always available especially when you are in the present moment. When tuned into the energy of love we are at our best.  

Now with that said it is absolutely necessary to develop the skills needed to tune in and stay tuned into that vibration no matter what is happening around you. When vibrating in love your entire field is vibrant and coherent. 

Imagine an old radio that has a little round dial that when turned can tune into different stations. When you are properly tuned into a station the white noise and static disappears and the signal becomes crystal clear. 

My favorite station growing up was KSFX and my sister’s was KLIV. We would constantly shift the dial back and forth, racing through the static to find the clear signal. When you find and tune into that station that broadcast can be heard by everyone in the room with you. Similarly when you are properly tuned into the vibration of love it can be felt by everyone in and near your field. This vibration is infectious and can easily align the others into the vibration. 

The goal should be to remain in this buoyant vibration as much as possible. This means that you can express your fears, desires, and requests from a place of love. You can break up with someone from a place of love, and you can love everyone despite their behavior and beliefs.

When necessary, you can choose to love from a distance rather than closing down love. If a person, a relative or ex is not healthy for you to be around, set healthy boundaries from a place of love to protect yourself without blocking your natural ability to be loving. By letting go of emotional blocks like blame, shame, judgement or anger you allow your natural state to be the victor. While still maintaining healthy boundaries. 

It may help to see Fear and Love are the major vibrations or stations, if you will. They are also the two biggest motivators in our lives. We are constantly moving towards one or the other with every decision we make. Negative emotions, such as envy, anger or judgement, will drive us more towards the vibration of fear resulting in making decisions based on fear, whereas love-based decisions allow us to harness positive energy, which can have lasting health benefits. Oxytocin, dopamine, and serotonin are just a few of the beneficial chemicals our bodies produce when experiencing love and happiness. The key is learning how to develop your ability to recognize, build, and embrace these states of mind, which I delve into in my upcoming book, The Greatlover Blueprint for Couples.

Like the rest of the universe human beings have ebbs and flows expansions and contractions.

During periods of contraction we tend to make up stories that justify the feelings thereby tuning into the station K-FEAR making it a habit rather than K-LOVE and feeling better. 

When in doubt, always ask this crucial question- What is the LOVING thing to do!?

With the many religions and belief systems in the world today, it’s easy to lose sight of what means the most among them all, and that is love. At the heart of all faiths is that God is Love. And what better place to practice that than with those that you love the most?

An even more masterful approach is to apply unconditional love to those you have a hard time loving – those you judge as wrong, bad, or other. By embracing this concept, you actively prevent negative people and negative influences from affecting your sense of well-being and joy. Rather you remain in love as much as possible.

Creating a greater and more consistent flow of Love into your life takes practice and may require that you heal the conditioning you have had since childhood. But it is 100% worth the effort. Unconditional love is a superpower that sits inside all of us, and to deny it would be denying inner peace and happiness.

Having a daily practice that assists you in mastering this state of mind for times of doubt or general negativity. No matter what you may be feeling any given day, do your best to return to the state of love you know well.


Tj Bartel is a relationship coach or master energy practitioner with more than 20 years of experience. Tj offers LEAP Sessions (Life-force Energetic Alignment Protocol) that combine all of his years of experience mastering powerful energy techniques, integrating modern brain science, and practicing ancient Tantric principles.