It’s no secret that men and women have very different styles of communication. The differences in these styles can seem small, but if not handled carefully, communication breakdowns and misunderstandings can be the result, leading to a whole host of other issues.
Women often express the desire for their male partners to be more emotionally available and communicative while men want their female partners to use fewer words and argue less. Instead of trying to change your partner, both men and women need to understand what is under the differences in the way the two sexes communicate and the importance of letting your partner be themselves.
Forcing your partner to act like the opposite sex can lead to depolarization. This means losing the natural magnetism that exists between the sexes. Depolarization leads to reduced sexual attraction and energetic and sexual harmony. When men are tuned into their masculine energy and women to their feminine, the relationship is harmonious. When things are out of tune, like listening to an untuned radio signal that sounds like static, the relationship feels frustrating and couples will start looking for little reasons to explain their frustration. Or, they’ll stop spending time with each other altogether.
Bridging the gap refers to understanding these key differences and learning how to work with them, instead of letting them work against you. Knowing how to communicate with your partner while still maintaining your masculinity and allowing her to keep her femininity will keep your relationship healthy and keep the attraction alive. Here are some tips for men to bridge the gap between them and their female partners.
Develop your emotional range
Women like to know what men are thinking to feel closer to them. Try to think about and identify your emotions and categorize them beyond the basic categories of sad, glad and mad. When a woman asks what you’re feeling, she is trying to connect with you.
Make space for her to be direct
Communicate with your partner that she can be straightforward about her needs and wants with you. Some women are disconnected from their needs and struggle to be direct with them. Be patient with her as she figures out how to do so. Some women are better able to say what they don’t want than what they do want. When your partner turns down your suggestions, view these “no’s” as clues to what she does want instead of a rejection of your ideas.
Use the pause technique
When your partner makes you feel emasculated, it’s normal to feel angry. But, off-loading your anger won’t get you anywhere. Instead, work on helping your partner shift her behavior. Before offering feedback, take some time to ground yourself. Take some time to pause and protect your masculine energy. Let your partner know that you aren’t running away from the conversation, but are instead taking some time to reflect on what has been shared so far to ensure that the discussion is productive. Set a time as to when you will return to pick up the conversation with her and be sure to return promptly at that time.
Finding and implementing proven strategies that help men and women understand and respect each others’ difference is an important part of building a solid and healthy relationship. If you want to learn more about how to create more harmony and attraction in your relationship, you can study with Tj in private, small group, and retreat settings. Call 855-836-8665 and set up an appointment to learn more.